5 Phone Calls

Politics can seem confusing and overwhelming; it's easy to not know exactly what to do. It's easy to want to give up and ignore it all. Instead, I made 5 phone calls about topics that are important to me. Why? My friend, Kat, has Howdy Politics on Instagram, FB, Substack, Threads, TikTok, and Bluesky. Her goal is to keep "Everyday Texans" informed and active regarding politics. She helps us understand what's actually going on in politics, what to focus on, and what actions we can take.

Recently, Howdy Politics made it clear that there was an immediate action to take:

HB 2 has to do with the basic financial allotment per public school student. If HB 2 isn’t passed as it was written by the House, public schools are likely to continue dealing with severe financial strains, potentially leading to:

• even more budget cuts,
• lower teacher salaries
• limited resources for students, including students with special needs.

The specific impacts would depend on the extent of the funding shortfall, but the HB2 provisions for increased per-student funding and teacher pay raises would not be implemented. 

Therefore, I called my two state senators using this script:

 “Hello, my name is _____and I’m a constituent in zip code_______. I’m calling to urge my Senator to reject the committee substitute for HB2 and instead request its passage as written and passed by the House. Thank you.“ 

During both phone calls, I made sure to be kind and thank the office person who answered the phone because I figured that they were having a long day. Plus, as a retired educator, I remember how much I appreciated parents being kind when they called me to discuss concerns.

***

I called three more politicians. They were at the US Capitol and the topics had to do with the Affordable Care Act and  Enhanced Premium Tax Credits

Each time that I called the US Capitol switchboard (#202-224-3121) and asked to be transferred to one of my Senators’ individual offices or to my Representative's individual office, I left them a personal message using this script:

“Hi, my name is [Your Name], and I’m a constituent from [Your City, State]. I’m calling to strongly urge [Senator/Representative Name] to vote NO on any bill that would weaken the Affordable Care Act. Specifically, I oppose the expiration of enhanced premium tax credits, the proposed Marketplace Integrity and Affordability Rule and any changes that would reduce Medicaid coverage. According to the CBO these changes could leave up to 13.7 million Americans uninsured by 2034. Please protect affordable health care access for all Americans. Thank you.”

***

Those phone calls were well worth my time. At least I can say that I'm trying to do something. To be honest, I really dreaded making the phone calls, but after the first one, it was pretty easy because I had written out and knew what I was going to say. Plus, the office people really seemed to be surprised when I was kind and thanked them for taking the time to talk with me and for working so hard. In fact, they seemed relieved. I figure if nothing else, they will know that not all who disagree are hateful. If we’re going to get people’s attention, we need to let them know that we’re not monsters.

***

Please consider contacting your senators/representatives for yourself, your children, your parents, grandparents, friends, your community, etc.

These are the links you can use to find your state and national senators and representatives: 

 https://wrm.capitol.texas.gov/home

https://www.congress.gov/members/find-your-member

A Trustworthy Path

I was raised in church but walked out in my mid-20s when my home church no longer felt safe. A year later, I moved from Central Texas to North Texas, started therapy, learned that my intuition might actually be reliable, and gave myself a much needed rest from religion.

A couple of years later, confusion, doubt, anger, and grief transitioned into a season of seeking. I was desperate to find out if there was any truth in Christianity or if everything that I’d been taught was a lie.

I searched the Religion and Christianity section of Barnes and Noble, and a title caught my eye: The God We Never Knew by Marcus Borg. Intrigued, I purchased it along with Borg’s Meeting Jesus Again for the First Time and became immersed in Borg’s writing. I couldn’t believe what I was reading! Others thought and felt as I did?! In fact, many of my ideas weren’t even new! 

An insatiable need to know more engulfed me. In addition to other Borg books, I read books by John Dominic Crossan, Bishop John Shelby Spong (one of my faves to this day), Neale Donald Walsch, C. David Grant, Bertrand Russell, Walter Wink, Roberta Bondi, Robert Funk, and others. I was both amazed and relieved that the words they wrote were, at times, nearly identical with my own thoughts, ideas, and opinions. I began to feel a renewed sense of confidence in my own intuition and a growing interest in learning about the history of Christianity. I attended a Jesus Seminar and even engaged in an email dialogue with Marcus Borg in April 2000. I wrote a letter to Bishop John Shelby Spong, and he wrote me back. I still have Borg’s emails and the handwritten letter that Bishop Spong sent me.

I learned a lot during that season because in addition to studying Christianity, Christian History, and World Religions, I joined a local Unitarian Universalist church because they honor all religions and all people. However, the UU church wasn't the fit that I was seeking, and I eventually just stopped going.

A few years later, I started fostering a 4th grader who wanted to go to church, so I took her to a nearby United Church of Christ because I felt that it would be a safe church for both of us. My foster daughter was able to get very involved in the church and she loved it. But, once she moved back to her mom’s house, I stopped attending.  

When I was in my mid-40's, I decided to try church once again. Since I was baptized United Methodist when I was young, I decided to check out a nearby UMC. I really liked it, so I kept going and found a Sunday School that I loved. I was even a front door greeter. Even though, I never actually joined, I thought that I had finally found my church!

But in 2019, I started hearing about a controversy within the UMC with regards to LGBTQ+ clergy. 

• As a school counselor who worked with LGBTQ+ students, I was immediately concerned. 

• As a critical thinker who believes that if God truly loves all then All Means All, I was immediately concerned. 

• As an Ally, I was immediately concerned. 

As a counselor, a critical thinker, and an Ally, I couldn’t attend a church whose denomination didn't fully honor LGBTQ+ clergy. I didn’t feel like I could be a greeter at the front door of my church anymore. It broke my heart, but I couldn’t stay. I just couldn’t. I felt like it would be too hypocritical to work with the LGBTQ+ community as a counselor and stand up for them as an Ally and then be part of a denomination that didn’t honor the LGBTQ+ clergy. 

Instead, I returned to the UU church that I'd been a member of many years earlier. From 2019-2024, I was part of a UU Women’s Journey Small Group. The UU Women’s Journey Small Groups are amazing, and I’m so glad that I was a part of them during those years. 

In 2022, I heard about Pub Theology and decided to check it out. Pub Theology is a monthly event held at a local pub. Officially, it’s “a space for open, honest, and meaningful conversations about faith, life, and everything in between. We believe that good questions are more important than easy answers and that deep conversations often happen best with a good drink in hand—whether that’s a pint, a cup of coffee, or sparkling water...Rooted in a Wesleyan perspective, we value grace, dialogue, and the belief that God is at work in the questions we ask and the relationships we build. Here, we encourage respectful engagement across theological perspectives, honest wrestling with scripture, and a commitment to seeing God at work in unexpected places…Whether you’re a lifelong believer, a skeptic, or somewhere in between, there’s a seat for you at the table. Pull up a chair and let’s talk!”

Pub Theology was a great evening with a group of people who weren’t afraid to discuss the big questions, and I loved that! It was sponsored by a nearby United Methodist Church - which at first concerned me because the UM denomination was still dealing with controversy re: LGBTQ+ clergy. However, the church that sponsored Pub Theology had made it quite clear that it was going to stand on the side of the LGBTQ+ clergy. I was impressed.

The more I learned, the more I realized that this might be the church that I had been looking for - a Christian church that actually allowed people with liberal belief systems to speak their minds and not be shamed or criticized for it. It even offered a class titled: From Deconstruction to Reconstruction which is a rather popular concept in this day and age. According to AI, deconstruction and reconstruction in Christianity refers to a process where individuals re-evaluate and often challenge previously held beliefs about their faith, leading to a re-imagining or rebuilding of their spiritual understanding.

I immediately signed up for that class! 

Keep in mind that I was still attending my UU Women’s Journey Small Group because those women were dear to me; however, this particular UMC was providing opportunities, answering questions, and connecting me to people with similar spiritual belief systems; several had even gone through church trauma and understood what that was like. For awhile, I jokingly referred to myself as bi-churchy because I was still going to the UU Women's Journey twice a month, and I was going to lots of UMC classes, events, and services the rest of the time! 

For about a year now, I've considered Grace Avenue as my home church, and I'm committed to several groups. Most importantly, I’m continuing to deconstruct in order to keep reconstructing and healing from church trauma. This past Sunday, I made it official and joined the church. I’m finally a member of Grace Avenue UMC. Talk about a full circle because I was baptized United Methodist as a toddler, and now I’m a member of the United Methodist Church as an adult. 

When I was 4 or 5 years old, I drew a picture of God on the chalkboard on the wall outside my bedroom. I’m now 56, and my spiritual journey is far from complete, but I do think I’m on a trustworthy path. I don’t think I could draw a picture of God today, but I know this much to be true: my intuition points toward God. God is Love. God is Peace. God loves All. All means All.

Breakthrough Seizure

I had a breakthrough seizure this week. It’s been nearly a year since my last seizure. 11 months actually. The last seizure I had was May 7, 2024.

So frustrating! I mean I know that it doesn’t constantly happen, but it keeps happening! It’s been nearly 12 years since my brain surgery. I’m so thankful that I had the opportunity to have brain surgery because I was having 2-3 seizures a MONTH, and now I’m only having about one a YEAR, but I’m still having one seizure about every year. So frustrating! So disappointing…

Plus post-seizure, the headache is horrendous and can last for a couple of days. This one sure did. Probably a migraine. 

Questions I always have to ask myself post-seizure:

• Have I missed any meds? I don’t think so.

• Am I sleep deprived? No

• Have I had any alcohol? No

• Have I had too much caffeine? Probably

• Am I overly stressed? Have you paid any attention to the news?!

I started having complex/partial seizures when I was 37, so it’s been about 19 years since I first started having seizures, and it never gets easier. It never seems to make sense. Why do meds work for some people but not for others? Why does surgery work for some people but not for others? These are the questions that I keep asking because I had surgery to have my left hippocampus removed (pic below), and I continue to take anti-seizure meds, but I still have occasional breakthrough seizures.  

Well, now you know what my thought processes are like after I’ve had a breakthrough seizure. Probably WAY more than you ever wanted to know. However, if you are still reading, thank you for being a part of my world. Thank you for your support. Much love.

New Holidays

April 10th was National Siblings Day. It seems like there have been several newly created holidays since I was a kid. Some federal holidays have been very much needed. For example:  Martin Luther King, Jr. Day became a federal holiday in 1983. Juneteenth National Holiday was finally signed into law on June 17th, 2021. I’m so thankful that our nation is acknowledging and honoring federal holidays for Dr. MLK, Jr. and Juneteenth. 

However, these are just a few of the new-ish holidays that I have only known about for a few years: 

• National Spouses Day-January 26

• National Sons Day-March 4

• National Daughters Day-September 25

• National Pets Day-April 11

The greeting card shelves were already packed. We’ve been honoring our mothers and fathers and celebrating anniversaries for decades, but now we honor siblings, spouses, sons, daughters, and pets. I wonder why. What is that about? 

Is it because the more we understand family dynamics, the more we understand the impact that our families of origin continue to have on our current lives, the more we want to try and have healthy relationships?

Is it because the more we understand the impact that our pets have on our emotional well-being, the more we understand our need to treat our pets as members of our families, the more we want to honor them with a special holiday? 

Is it because creating days to celebrate and honor those we care about is a way that we can further show our love for them?

Is it simply because greeting card businesses want to increase their sales by creating new holidays? 

Is it any of that? Is it all of that? 

I don’t know. But, I do know that I’m thankful for my sibling.

25 Hours

Senator Cory Booker made the news earlier this week. He said, “Tonight, I rise with the intention of getting in some good trouble. I rise with the intention of disrupting the normal business of the United States Senate for as long as I am physically able.” He remained standing (and didn’t eat or go to the bathroom) for 25 hours because he believes that our country is in crisis. Would I have been willing to do that? Would I be willing to be physically uncomfortable in order to stand up for what I believe?

This evening during a class, we were discussing the Holocaust and how scary it must have been to endanger yourself and your family in order to protect Anne Frank’s family. Would I have been willing to do that? Would I be willing to endanger myself to help protect others who are being persecuted? 

The history books are full of the brave. Harriet Tubman and those who participated in the Underground Railroad helped many people find freedom. The suffragette movement leaders who championed women’s rights helped bring about the 19th amendment: my right to vote. Rosa Parks was arrested because she refused to give up her seat on the bus to a white passenger. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. ended up sacrificing his own life in the civil rights movement. 

As a child, I always thought:

Of course, I would have helped Anne Frank.

Of course, I would have helped the Underground Railroad.

Of course, I would have participated in the Civil Rights movement. 

As an adult, I have to ask myself:

Have I helped those who are being persecuted?

Have I helped the oppressed find freedom?

Have I championed the rights of all people?

Our descendants will learn about our country's current crisis in their history classes. Will you be on the compassionate side, the humane side, the right side of this time in history? Will I?

Reading stories about brave people is fun and exciting, but the decision to actually be a brave person will always take courage. Do you have that courage? Do I?

Rosa Parks refused to stand up.

Senator Cory Booker refused to sit down.

You Are Not Alone

People are struggling. So many are fearful, frustrated and angry. Some are handling it by staying immersed in the news. Others are handling it by staying away from the news. Some are protesting and marching - still determined to *fight the good fight. Others are tired of fighting because they feel like it no longer does any good. Just about everyone feels overwhelmed. 

Five years ago, the world shut down, and it’s just been a few years since it opened back up. Our country is still processing the trauma we experienced during the pandemic. The schools shut down. Businesses shut down. People were sick. People died. People lost loved ones. We didn’t know what to do or what to expect. Eventually, there was a vaccine which should have made everything better. Tragically, the vaccine turned into a divisive political issue. For some people, it even divided their families.

Now just a few years later, America is immersed in another serious crisis, and the country is even more divided. So many people feel disconnected and lonely which adds another layer to their fear, another layer to their anger, another layer to their grief. 

However, there is a difference this time. You don't have to stay home. You don’t have to deal with this crisis in isolation.

Please find your community. Find the people who support you. Find your community at church. Find your community in a group, team, or club. Find your community online. Wherever you feel safe and comfortable, find your community. 

Please find your passion. What brings you peace? What brings you energy? What gives you purpose? What do you find meaningful? Find your passion and get involved - either in person or online. If you’d like to keep learning, take a class. Just get involved. Do something that is positive for yourself.

This is not a time to isolate and stop taking care of yourself. Positive connections with others are valuable for positive mental health.This is a time to stay connected and follow your passion. Please know that you are not alone, so take care of yourself… and each other. 

* partial quote taken from 1 Timothy 6:12

Thank You

Thank you for your FB comments. Thank you for sharing. Thank you for your messages. Thank you for your blog comments. Thank you for being so real with your reactions to my When It All Falls Apart blog last week. Your responses have made it clear to me that so many people have experienced church trauma. If you want to share your story with me, I want you to know that I’m here to listen.

Based on your responses, I’m considering a When It All Falls Apart Blog Series in which people can share their experiences with me. I can write your story for you and post it on my blog. I won’t use your real name (unless you want me to). I just want you to know how freeing it is to tell people what happened to you. If you'd like to know more, please message me on FB or respond with a comment on my blog and be sure to leave your email so I can contact you.

-From a blessing for when church breaks your heart: 

Bless you, dear one. 

You who don’t give up wrestling.
Who have eyes to see something new
being rebuilt on top of what was.

Blessed are you who walk away
wounded, yes. But changed.

You are not the bad thing.
You are a gift.
And we love every bit of you. 

-Kate Bowler

https://katebowler.com/blessings/a-blessing-for-when-faith-breaks-your-heart/

When It All Falls Apart...

I used to love going to church! My parents tell me that my brother and I were christened Methodist, but the first church that I remember was First Baptist Church in Arlington, and when we moved to Brownwood, so did our church membership. 

When I was 15, my family started attending a charismatic church which had a focus on prosperity theology. It was definitely a different type of church (when people started dancing in the service, it scared me), but everybody was very nice. Plus, there were lots of fun activities: youth group, church camp, mission trips…you name it! It was a great church! 

Until it wasn’t.

My home church went from being a second home to being a place that no longer felt safe. It went from being a place which I thought taught the truth to being a place which I felt had lied to me. It went from being a place that felt like a loving family to being a place where people yelled and screamed and hurt each other. 

Yes, I was raised in church, but in my mid-twenties, I left.

It’s been 30 years since I walked out of that church. Since then, I've had the opportunity to deconstruct my faith and spend many hours in therapy. I've even found a healthy church to attend. Yes, they do exist! So, a lot has changed in my life. I have many stories to tell - maybe on another day. But, I know what it’s like to be hurt by the church...by the people you trust. I know what it’s like when a place that used to feel safe, no longer feels safe. I know what it's like when you aren't sure who or what to believe anymore.

I know what it’s like when it all falls apart.

Growing Up: Sistren Everywhere

As I explained earlier, the Sistren are a group of women who feel like it is their responsibility (perhaps even their calling) to help take care of everyone else.The Sistren have many talents and abilities, many goals and ambitions. You might recognize a Sistren in your mother, your sister, your daughter, your teacher, your lawyer, your doctor, and yes, even your mother-in-law. 

Much is expected of the Sistren. Fortunately, much is also given. Birds of a feather flock together, and the Sistren are no exception. From preschool to college and throughout their careers, the Sistren will find that there are multitudes of other Sistren to journey along beside them. These precious souls laugh with one another when a Sistren is happy, cry with her when she’s hurting, and give each other plentiful advice on every conceivable issue including whether or not to conceive...and with whom.

The Sistren will dance at your wedding--and wholeheartedly agree with your divorce. They are a bona fide reference guide of information on any topic due to their nationwide networking.Therefore, if you are planning a trip to Cozumel or a move to the East Coast, the Sistren can tell you the best hairdressers, realtors, lawyers, doctors, preschools, and restaurants in that area. 

When the internet first gained popularity in the ‘90s, the Sistren were a bit concerned that their superiority as an information network was being challenged. However, this concern was short-lived once they realized that the internet was actually offering them one more way to communicate! Email and social media were celebrated by Sistren worldwide.The Mothren claimed that an ancient prophecy was being fulfilled! A new era had dawned! 

Looking back, I am so thankful to have had the opportunity to grow up surrounded by so many Sistren. Yes, Sistren are strong. Yes, Sistren are spicy. Yes, Sistren will speak their minds. Yes, I am SO THANKFUL to have been raised by women who taught me to speak up, who taught me to speak out, who taught me that my thoughts matter, that what I do matters, and that who I am matters.

I am so thankful that I grew up Sistren!